Fortune: Jes, how did Peter’s diagnosis and coming out change your perspective on leadership?
Jes: Well, I think it was a seminal moment in my life, in terms of understanding what courage really is. I felt like I saw firsthand the greatest human courage that I’ve personally ever witnessed. And I thought, what’s going on here? What is courage really about? And then, as I rose in the organization, I started to understand that diversity in the workplace was not just about fairness or about social justice. It was about commercial success. It was about getting the best out of your team, getting the best out of the people you work with.
Fortune: Jes, you’ve been involved in diversity efforts at J.P. Morgan and Barclays. How do you view your role in those efforts?
Jes: When I was at J.P. Morgan, I was always in the trenches with the HR people, with the diversity team, trying to make the case that this was an important part of building a successful team. And then at Barclays, that was a big part of my pitch to the board and to the shareholders, that if you want to have a successful organization, if you want to have a successful bank, you need to give everyone a chance to be their best. You need to give everyone an opportunity to be who they really are.
Fortune: Peter, you’ve been a prominent activist for LGBT rights and HIV/AIDS awareness. How do you see the connection between activism and leadership?
Peter: I think activism is leadership. It’s about standing up for what you believe in, even when it’s difficult, even when it’s controversial. It’s about being willing to take risks, to push boundaries, to challenge the status quo. That’s what leadership is all about, in my opinion.
Fortune: What advice do you have for young leaders, especially those who may be facing challenges similar to what you both have faced?
Peter: I would say, don’t be afraid to be who you are. Embrace your authenticity, your uniqueness. Don’t let fear hold you back. And remember, true leadership comes from within, from your values and your beliefs.
Jes: And I would add, surround yourself with people who support you, who believe in you, who challenge you to be your best self. And never forget the power of empathy, of understanding and compassion. That’s what really makes a great leader.
Fortune: Thank you both for sharing your stories and insights with us. It’s been a pleasure to hear about your incredible journeys to leadership.
Jes: The idea was to put a giant condom over his house. We did it. It was actually a weather balloon that we inflated with helium, and we flew it over his house. And it was beautiful. It was a beautiful sunny day in North Carolina. We had a lot of media coverage. And he was so enraged.
Peter: As my father said, “That balloon was worth a million bucks.”
Jes: He was so enraged, he spent the next two years trying to figure out who did it. He even convened a grand jury to investigate. The grand jury actually indicted me. They couldn’t get me because I was in New York, and New York wouldn’t extradite me. But he was so enraged. It was a beautiful thing.
Peter, you were getting arrested, you were getting fired, and yet your brother was rising in finance. How did that feel?
Peter: I was very proud. I felt like we were both doing what we were meant to do. I was meant to do ACT UP and TAG and all the AIDS activism that I did. And Jes was meant to be a great banker and a great philanthropist and a great advocate for LGBT rights. I think we both felt we were in our own lanes and doing the right thing. I never felt resentful that he was in the corporate world. And I think he never felt resentful that I was in the activist world. We felt like our paths were complementary.
Jes: There was a point in time when I was at J.P. Morgan and I was out, and I was also out as Peter’s brother. And I was very proud of him. I was proud of what he was doing. And I was proud of my own ability to be out. So it was a moment in time when we both felt like we were doing the right thing, and we were doing it well.
Do you think that moment in time is still happening?
Peter: I think it’s gotten a lot better. But I think that moment in time was really a function of the time we were in. It was the late ’80s, early ’90s. It was a time when activism was more common. It was a time when being out was very different than it is today. So I think that moment in time was really a product of the environment that we were in.
Jes: I think that moment in time was really a product of our commitment to each other and our commitment to the cause. And I think that’s something that will always be there.
Peter: Absolutely.
Jes: We’ll always be brothers, and we’ll always be committed to this cause.
Peter: Absolutely.
Jes: Thank you.
Peter: Thank you.
Jes, were you surprised when Peter finally told you about his addiction?
Jes: I was shocked, but I was also deeply relieved that he was on the other side of it. I knew that he had been struggling, but I didn’t know the extent. I was just happy that he was getting clean and getting the help he needed.
Peter, looking back now, what do you think helped you overcome your addiction?
Peter: It was a combination of things – the support of my friends and family, the structure of the 12-step program, and the professional help I received. It was a long and difficult journey, but I am grateful to be on the other side of it now.
What advice would you give to others who may be struggling with addiction?
Peter: Reach out for help. You don’t have to go through it alone. There are resources and people who care about you and want to see you get better. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
And Jes, how did Peter’s experience with addiction impact your relationship?
Jes: It made us closer. It showed me a side of Peter that I hadn’t seen before, and it made me appreciate him even more. It also reinforced the importance of being there for each other through the good times and the bad. Peter’s strength and resilience are truly inspiring.
As you look towards the future, what are your hopes and aspirations?
Peter: My hope is to continue advocating for HIV/AIDS research and treatment, and to see a cure or a functional cure in my lifetime. I also hope to continue sharing my story to inspire others and raise awareness about addiction and recovery.
Jes: My aspiration is to continue working towards greater equality and inclusion for all, especially in the workplace. I want to be a champion for diversity and acceptance, and to make a positive impact on the world around me.
Thank you both for sharing your incredible journey and for your ongoing commitment to making the world a better place. Your courage and resilience are truly inspiring.
No puedo hacer eso.