So, I’ve tried to balance that with other things that I find fulfilling. And I think that when you’re making music for a living, it’s a lot harder to find that balance, because it’s so easy to just keep working. But I’ve realized that for me, the more I’m doing different things and the more I’m collaborating with different people, the more inspired and excited I am about everything. So I try to keep that in mind and not let myself get too bogged down in one thing.
How did your experience with cancer influence the themes and emotions on this album?
I started writing the album before I was diagnosed, but I definitely think that going through cancer and treatment and coming out on the other side influenced the themes and emotions a lot. I think I was kind of in a place where I was reevaluating a lot of things in my life and my priorities, and so that definitely came through in the writing. It’s interesting because I feel like it’s a lot more vulnerable and open than anything I’ve done before, and I think that’s probably a result of going through something so intense and coming out the other side. It’s like, “Okay, well, now I don’t really have anything to hide anymore.”
What was it like to go on a whitewater rafting trip with other young adult cancer survivors? How did that experience impact you?
It was amazing. I had never done anything like that before, and I was really nervous about it, but it ended up being one of the most incredible experiences of my life. It was just so inspiring to be around all of these other people who had been through something similar and come out the other side. It was really empowering to see all of these people who had been through something so intense and were still out there living their lives and having fun. It definitely gave me a new perspective on things and made me realize how lucky I am to be here and to have the opportunity to keep making music and doing what I love.
What are your plans for the future, both musically and personally?
Right now, I’m just focusing on promoting this album and getting it out there. I’m really proud of it and I’m excited for people to hear it. I’m also starting to work on some new music, so hopefully I’ll have another album out soon. Personally, I just want to keep exploring and trying new things and pushing myself out of my comfort zone. I feel like I’ve learned a lot over the past few years, and I’m excited to see where that takes me.
Thank you so much for taking the time to chat with us, Jessica!
Thank you!
Time never felt certain, it just felt comfortable. It felt like I knew what was coming next, even if I didn’t really. And now, it feels like anything could happen at any moment. It feels chaotic and unpredictable. But at the same time, that uncertainty has led to growth and self-discovery. So, while I may sometimes wish for that sense of certainty again, I also appreciate the lessons and insights that come with the diseased time.” But at the end of the day, I can only control how I show up in the world and how I treat others. So, ‘Exactly Where You Want to Be’ is about that feeling of being at peace with yourself and your decisions, even when things may not be going as planned. It’s about finding that grace and acceptance within yourself, even in uncertain or difficult situations.
Overall, the album is a reflection of my journey of self-discovery and growth, both before and after my cancer diagnosis. It’s about learning to prioritize myself and my well-being, and finding grace and acceptance in the face of challenges. It’s about letting go of what no longer serves me and embracing what truly matters to me. And through it all, music has been a constant source of healing and catharsis for me. I hope that listeners can find solace and connection in these songs, and perhaps even find their own moments of self-discovery and growth along the way.
”
Fue muy liberador poder decir: “No, ya no hago eso”, y poder escribir al respecto.
Siento que hay un equilibrio que logras entre canciones que son, no necesariamente nostálgicas, pero reflexivas de forma ligera, y otras que son reflexivas de una manera más melancólica y compleja. Es casi literalmente los dos lados del disco.
Realmente estaba escribiendo lo que me parecía correcto. Creo que, a nivel personal, estaba yendo de un lado a otro entre lidiar con lo que estoy enfrentando ahora y lo que está justo frente a mí, pero también sabiendo que para hacer eso, necesitaba hacer mucha reflexión. No quería que fuera como el antes y el ahora en el álbum; quería que oscilara entre los dos porque sentía que no podía hacer uno sin el otro, mentalmente. Creo que terminó sucediendo bastante naturalmente, que fue una distribución bastante equitativa de los dos lados.
Quiero volver a esa línea en la que describes el tiempo como un cierto sentimiento. ¿Cómo dirías que se siente el tiempo para ti ahora?
Creo que antes del cáncer había una sensación de tiempo interminable para mí. Aunque tenía mucho miedo de morir y de muchas otras cosas, todo parecía tan lejano. Y luego, pasar por esta situación donde te enfrentas a la posibilidad de morir, y de que tu vida pueda ser más corta que la media, realmente cambió cómo veía el futuro, en el sentido de que dejé de ver el futuro. Lo cual creo que de alguna manera era aterrador y empoderador al mismo tiempo porque nunca he sido alguien que se desenvolviera muy bien viviendo en el momento. Era como: “Tengo que hacerlo, de lo contrario, no voy a superar esto muy bien”.
Diría que el tiempo todavía se siente bastante incierto, pero no de una manera que me asuste tanto. Creo que realmente he absorbido esa sensación de que: el pasado no es real y el futuro no es real porque nunca es el futuro, es simplemente hoy. He escuchado eso y me han dicho cosas así en la atención plena y yo estaba como: “Uf, lo que sea”. Pero siento que lo siento ahora. Lo siento ahora más que nunca en mi vida, lo cual creo que es una sensación agradable.
Esta entrevista ha sido editada y condensada para mayor claridad y extensión.
The Faster I Run de Jessica Boudreaux ya está disponible a través de Pet Club.